After a grueling school day, I was finally able to relax and waste time like I usually do. Like a pregnant mother, I developed some uncomfortable cravings during the day that needed to be satiated immediately. I was craving Vietnamese food, so I went back to my all time favorite Vietnamese restaurant Pho Tranh in Phoenix. Upon arrival, I realized that they were closed Tuesday. Not only did I waste 30 minutes zooming down the highway, I couldn’t satisfy my poor belly. Thank god for technology and Yelp because I was able to find some bangin’ restaurants nearby. I decided to hit up a Mexican restaurant because it’s important to honor the sacred holiday that is Taco Tuesday. I settled upon this funky restaurant called Joyride Taco House.
Ordering at this place was a nightmare. Many college students also realized it was Taco Tuesday which meant the lines were jam-packed with college kids. After growing a full beard, I got my food and whizzed back home. With drool swirling in my oral cavities, I put the pedal to the metal and drove home at “irresponsible” speeds.
After arriving at home, disaster had already struck. My poor tacos were left without an ounce of heat in them. Truthfully, I really didn’t care because my tummy was rumbling. After taking my sweet time to take Instagram-worthy pics, it was time to eat. I bought an array of different tacos including their Pork Adobada, Carne Asada, The Standard, Carnitas, and Baja Fish.
Before I begin with their tacos, they included some complimentary chips and 
salsa which was a nice touch. The chips were salted well and had an audible crunch – pretty standard for any chip. The salsa had a darker hue than expected but tasted like any normal salsa. Most notably, it featured a heat that would slowly creep up on your throat which was an interesting sensation, to say the least. After shoving a mountain worth of chips into my mouth, it was time for the real deal.
Carne Asada – Their carne asada was consistent with small morsels of carne asada, cilantro, onion, and cabbage. The meat was surprisingly dry which is not a good sign for any taco place. I’m not sure if the blame should be placed on the restaurant for improperly preparing it or the long drive that I took. The other ingredients did nothing to improve the taste but added complexity to the texture by giving it a crunch courtesy of the cabbage and raw onions. They also neglected to put any sauces, so this taco was doomed. If you’re betting everything on one single aspect of a taco, you better not screw up that one part. Unfortunately, this taco was a massive flop and left me worried for the rest of Joyride’s tacos.
The Standard – Just from looks, this taco looked far sexier than the rest. You
had a rainbow of colors with a bright red pico gringo, splashes of green from the avocado and cilantro, a nice yellow hue from the aji amarillo, and some lightly roasted chicken to top it all off. Every bite I took was a flavor explosion with all the ingredients working in perfect harmony. The chicken was slightly bland but at least it was moist. The avocado added a brilliant fatty component which was much needed since chicken is a pretty lean meat. I’ve never had aji amarillo, but it’s a viscous sauce with a spicy profile that really elevated the personality of this taco. In contrast, the pico gringo brought an acidic component with the tomatoes which helped to neutralize the spicy, fatty aji amarillo. This taco was light years away from the previous one and truly fantastic. I would definitely head back just for this taco.
Baja Fish – The baja fish taco was easy on the eyes with a crispy, battered fish, pico gringo, some sort of slaw, and slathered with some white sauce on the very top. I took my first bite, and I was instantly annoyed. That golden, fried shell had lost its signature texture and left me with a mouthful of soggy batter. The actual fish was still succulent while the rest of the ingredients not only accompanied the fish but elevated it to new heights. Overall, it was mediocre at best, but it would’ve been excellent had I opted to dine in and ate the taco immediately out of the kitchen.
Pork Adobada – Pork Adobada is generally composed of pork shoulder braised in some sort of spicy marinade. In our case, they used guajillo chilis which packed a punch of capsaicin. It’s a decent taco with tender meat dripping in both in its own juices and fat. I felt that the taco was a bit too simplistic and could’ve had an additional component. Perhaps, they could’ve added some tart pineapple to counter the fatty meat by providing hints of sweetness.
Carnitas – Traditionally, carnitas is generally all about the pork shoulder due to its high-fat content. Fat allows the meat to stay juicy and tender when cooking and also accentuates the flavor profile. Unfortunately, this pork was insanely dry. Additionally, the accompanying ingredients of raw onions, cilantro, and lettuce didn’t do much to help out the poor taco. Once again, you better not screw up the main ingredient of the dish if you want to please people.
Joyride Taco House is definitely a restaurant where you should dine in because the quality decreases tremendously if you try takeout. I would say it’s a hit or miss spot with some spectacular and atrocious tacos. Your safest bet is to stick with the Baja Fish and The Standard because they’re jam-packed with all sorts of ingredients, providing a whirlwind of flavors. On the other hand, stay away from their meat-based tacos such as the Carne Asada or their Carnitas because they’re drier than a hot summer’s day and will leave your mouth screaming for water. I recommend everyone to try out this establishment for themselves, and you can find them at 5202 N Central Ave Phoenix, AZ. As for now, I’m off to hibernate.
